Control Drama.

Do You know who I am?

by Dr. Terry Martin

Control dramas are played by people with low power or energy. They use drama to manipulate someone, thereby stealing their energy.

Control dramas are unconscious behaviors people use to gain power and essentially, get their way. They make others pay attention so they can elicit a certain reaction.

Many people engage in control dramas without realizing what they are doing, and to what extent and expense. If you need to defend yourself and react by engaging in a defensive response you are in a control drama.

Be aware of control drama and what it is, so you can break the cycle and disconnect.

There are four types of control dramas:

Intimidators steal energy from others by threat. Interrogators steal it by judging and questioning. Aloof people attract attention to themselves by withdrawing.

And a ‘poor me' makes us feel guilty and responsible for them.

All are attempts to control another’s behavior.

We try to control and manipulate others because we believe that if they change their behavior, we will both be happy.

When someone does things we don’t like, or when we don’t get our way, we think they are wrong and we are right. So we believe we have the right to impose our beliefs on them––when what we are doing is protecting our beliefs.

In a relationship, the most aggressive person is the intimidator who steals energy from others by dominating them; making them feel inferior either with physical or verbal aggression. That way the intimidator gets to feel better, and the others feel worse.

The interrogator feels good by asking borderline, aggressive questions that make the other person feel small. Then the interrogator feels superior.

Aloof people cope by acting distant and hide what they really think or feel by either not answering or answering evasively.

Poor Me people play the victim. They say their life is awful; it’s all unfair. They use guilt or pity to manipulate. They say things like, “Don’t worry, I’ll just carry on, I’m used to doing everything by myself.” Or, “After all I have done for you, you’re letting me down, like this?”

Avoid signals of poor mental health habits and narcissistic disorders. You are entitled to live without such behaviors interfering with your growth, happiness, and desires.

Thanks for reading and sharing, fewer control dramas help to induce peace. DOC